“My spouse and I were married, and a few days/weeks later, he/she deployed to Iraq/Afghanistan.”
Stories of spouses who are separated by a deployment just after their wedding are common in the military. Our story is one of those, and it’s changed the way I view our life together.
While he’s at work today, I’m working on freelance deadlines and looking forward to an upcoming getaway to Budapest. I am blessed.
This time last year, I was traveling without him; running my way through his deployment one race at a time. Summer fighting season was winding down in Afghanistan, and we’d not had many phone calls through the summer months.
I didn’t have to search Google for “Kunar + Afghanistan” today to figure out how his day or week is going. He’ll be home for dinner, and he’ll tell me about his day then. He kissed me goodbye this morning and he’ll kiss me goodnight tonight.
When we go to Budapest, we’ll be together.
Life is good.
When you start your marriage separated by deployment…
- it’s nearly impossible to take for granted holding hands on the couch at night.
- a weekend getaway anywhere feels like a gift (Eastern European ones doubly so).
- you learn that conversations can wait until the right time; immediate gratification is easy, but patience builds confidence in yourself and in your relationship.
- it’s nothing short of magical knowing that by the time he deploys again (if he deploys again), a new human will be in the world who’s half him and half you.
Not a day goes by when I don’t feel, at least in passing, grateful that we’re together with no deployments in the foreseeable future.
What has deployment taught you and your family?
How has it changed your outlook on your marriage and the time you get to spend together?